Don't Beam Me Down

Intro

Yeah
MC Chopped in the mothership, motherfucker
Suburban saucer season
Let's go

Verse 1

Big dad bod pushin' a grocery cart
Clenchin' my cheeks holdin' in a fart
Cringe dad dances at the barbecue
Kids like, "yo, dad, you're a walking 'L' dude"
Late night, lawn chair, scrolling on my phone
Yelling at the birds like, "leave my drone alone"
Then the cul-de-sac cracked, lights went loud
Minivan levitating off the ground like "wow"
Beam knocked off my sketchy slides
Ring doorbell catching my terrified eyes
I was like "Bet, they finna let me cook"
Locked in a tractor beam, totally shook

pause

Chorus

Don't beam me down, I’m bussin’ into orbit (yeah)
They tweaked my tongue, now the flow so morbid
Turned a cringe old dad to the ultimate boss
Gigga-chadd, hella bad, straight up drownin’ in the sauce
Don't beam me down, I belong up here
Got the glow, got the flow, got the drip so clear
If I land on Earth now, I’ma run this town
So the aliens chant, "don't, don't beam him down"

Verse 2

Silver-skinned shawty with the seven green eyes
Said, "we gon’ stretch syllables, scramble your mind"
Strapped me to a table made of Tesla glass
Probe in my brain, played podcasts from my past
They rewired my rhymes, realigned my rhythm
Injected interstellar idioms in my system
Now my diction doing digital gymnastics, drastic
Dad jokes jumping over quantum traffic
They like, "spit"
So I did, went sick
Triple-time tongue-twists, talkin’ straight-up lit
Whole ship shook when I dropped that switch
They yelling "He’s him! That’s the son of a bitch!"
Next stop, alien Airbnb
Hot tub full of blue girls staring at me
Sipping moon milk, playing intergalactic beer pong
I missed every cup but I still made a cheer song (hey!)

Chorus

Don't beam me down, I’m vibing with the stars now
Got a galaxy of baddies gettin’ loud in the crowd
Earthling millennial starin' at they tits
Every punchline hits like a solar eclipse
Don't beam me down, I’m their favorite clown
I’m the space camp champ, I’m the talk of the town
If I drop on Earth now, every king lose crown
So the aliens chant, "don't, don't beam him down"

Bridge

Beat drops, airy pads swell

(Whoa) I was mid-tier dad with the dad-tier jokes
Now every bar built like a black hole choke
Pulling every little syllable into the center
Say a sentence, split it, send it, slender
Swirling syntax, savage and slick
Saucy semantics, sarcastic flips
They tap my temple, "this one different"
Data-driven, deltoid dad, delinquent (yeah)

Verse 3

But they finally said, "fam, you gotta go home"
"Your planet need cringe, you their CEO"
Strapped me in a pod with a Bluetooth mic
Gave me one last night full of ultraviolet lights
Party on Pluto, Pluto in my cup
Woke up in my driveway, Prius backed up
Kids on the porch like, "dad, you sus"
Wife like, "why your fit covered in moon dust?"
I shrugged, hit play on my brand-new track
Neighbors do the wave, even Karen in the back
Every teen in the crowd screamin’ "No cap, that's fire!"
Understood the assignment, Ima top tier supplier
On god, I'm the king, got the whole block shakin’
Leavin’ all the NPC’s totally quakin’
And every time I feel that beam in the clouds above
I just wink at the sky, that’s my alien love

Chorus

Don't beam me down, I already done landed
Turned PTA meetings to a tour, got it branded
From the cul-de-sac grass to the cosmic crown
I’m the dad with the drip, you can’t clone this sound
Unlocked the infinite rizz, on god, it's elite
Leaving absolute fire in the middle of the street
Don't beam me down, if you pick me up again
I’ma bring the whole block, all my washed-up friends
Don’t beam me down
(Dont, don’t beam him down)
Don’t beam me down
(Dont, don’t beam him down)